Miss Blue and friend (an editor for one of the country’s biggest selling newspapers), were both lying fast asleep in the office.

The aroma of booze that hung in the air reminded me that they had both popped off to a whisky tasting event in at Traquair House. It was organised by Royal Mile Whiskies, who should have known better as to the consequences of serving folk endless drams of the hard stuff so early in the day.

I had left them at 3pm. Five hours later, they were obliterated.

As I crept over their bodies, sprawled across the floor in the most un-ladylike of fashions, Miss Blue promptly awoke and slurred the immortal words: “Curio, I luuuuuurve ya!”. Before promptly collapsing back to sleep.

As I mused upon her heartfelt declaration, the other ‘corpse’ arose and groaned:

“Curio, how wassssssss George Clary? I love ya tooooooooooo!”

The barley-sodden duo have one hour to wake up and sober up before Siren, an outdoor live installation piece, that is part of the Aurora Nova programme. It promises to be a spectacle. Find out tomorrow if we all make it there!

On that note I’d better dash and cold baths await these dizzy damsels.

Only during the Edinburgh Festival can an afternoon spent with the man who made claimed he’d fisted the Chancellor of the Exchequor, be the more dignified part of your day.

Exeunt.