The illness currently has the city of Edinburgh in its grip and the disorder is mainly prevalent among performers and those working in the arts during the month of August.

The disease is viewed as particularly dangerous as symptoms tend to go unnoticed by sufferers.

The condition has been likened to schizophrenia in that, on one hand, sufferers carry inner feelings of depraved self-ambition and excessive zest for their own show and indeed their self-importance within the world around them.

Largely a delusional disorder, CONFI-DENTED-ITIS should not be confused with lunacy, which is a lesser strain of the illness.

CONFI-DENTED-IT counter-balances these feelings of euphoria in the patient, with the contradictory and far darker emotions of impending doom, fear of failure and threat of bankruptcy. As a result, the patient will often experience low self-esteem and heightened panic.

Signs to look out for in sufferers include seeing them visibly sweat like gammon every time their performance-time draws near.

Sufferers tend to adopt a number of coping strategies to deal with these aforementioned negative emotions. The most common such strategy is the consumption of copious amounts of alcohol.

Alcohol is viewed by sufferers as the magical elixir that will restore their internal state back to a harmonious feeling of depraved self-ambition and excessive zest for their own show and indeed their self-importance within the world around them.

Recognise any of the symptoms?